it's a question that i've been asking myself for a few days now after i found out that someone close to me, who, as much as i am loathe and ashamed to admit, i personally had accepted would be found dead in a gutter somewhere pretty much any day now, stopped drinking 5 months ago. just made a decision that he wasn't going to drink anymore and put it the fuck DOWN. no rehab, no weaning, no sponsorship, no 12 step program, nothing. just stopped drinking. and if that wasn't a big enough chunk to gnaw off, he stopped smoking as well. cigarettes, not weed...he's not completely crazy.
i know people who have quit smoking and i know people who have quit drinking. among them are those who just stopped one day, as well as those who struggled and backslid for YEARS before they were successful. i know people who are sure they will die if they even attempt to quit smoking. i know people that would rather die than quit drinking. i have been exposed to addiction my entire life. i live in fear of it's grip, not over me as much as over my children. i firmly believe that the weakness for alcoholism, most likely to addiction in general, is a genetic predisposition. it is too prevalent in my family tree for me to ignore.
so...the question remains - how is it possible? could he have not been addicted at all...? over the years, alcohol has cost him jobs, relationships, homes, and other things - all just too numerous to count...is it possible that he just forrest gumped? did he simply decide one day - after 50 years, 2 months, 14 days and 16 hours - that he was just "pretty tired"?
someday, i will ask him...for now i am still processing. and happy for him. really really happy for him.
No comments:
Post a Comment