i've been stewing about this cleaning of the bedroom thing for two days now and have come to the conclusion that there really is nothing i can do to *make* him clean his room. he's too big to drag around by the hand and force him to pick things up. my choices are to clean it up on my own - this might actually prompt him to take a full can of garbage and pepper his room with it...he's that stubborn; let him live in his filth - which, granted, isn't horrible...i *can* see the floor, there isn't food growing in there and he's right about the fact that a clean room isn't "necessary" to a productive life; or i can attempt to show him the error of his newly acquired, let's call them "logically free-thinking" ways.
let's take the first option...if i clean his room it causes two problems: one, *I* have to clean his room - ew. two, honestly i would only be doing it to piss him off - he despises his room when it's clean...he says it's depressing. safe to say this isn't the best option. next...
second option: what message does letting him blatantly defy me send to the other two sweet wonderful accommodating children that do clean their rooms when i ask? is it just a matter of time before they put their humongous feet down and refuse to clean their rooms in an act of sibling solidarity? this option does not sit well with me as the MOTY that needs to keep her children respecting her authority in order to not go completely insane, resulting in the packing of my shit and leaving them all with their dad.
option three: he says i'm being spiteful, he says i'm ignoring the respect he has and does show me and painting him unfairly as a derisive little punk. i will admit, the term passive-agressive *has* entered my mind the last two days as i contemplate all of the things i do for him that are truly "unnecessary", but i think i'm gonna run with this option...
i think it will show him that he can't have it both ways - that if one path is chosen, another is foresaken. sacrifices must be made, repercussions will follow the liberating act of overriding authority with "logic"...he needs to be ready to embrace everything that his decision entails and that it's NOT spiteful, it's NOT passive-agressive, it's NOT disregarding his goodness...
it's NOT personal, it's life.
right? RIGHT?!?
f me if shit and two isn't eight.
1 comment:
option 3 would be my choice too (although you failed to mention my fave, option 4: duct tape)... I think you're doing the right thing showing him that our choices usually have a reciprocal effect... you get what you give. the sooner he learns to pick his battles, the better. arguing logic will only get you so far in day to day life and you can pert much fuhgeddabout it when it comes to going up against yo mama's rules! :D hang in there chick! {xoxo}
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